My parents were so happy to see me cleaned up! I gave up habits that I wanted, felt and smelled good! They gave me a place to live and a car again because they were so proud of me and the changes I had made. I was a failure because my mindset was still the same deep down; and I was just looking for an opportunity to do what I wanted to do again - and that was to get high and hang out. This is one of the main stupid reasons I moved back to Baltimore. Now that I had accumulated a lot of money, more than I had ever earned from working, I decided to do the same things I had been doing stupidly before expecting different results. This time when I was exposed to my parents I had to leave the house and they let me keep the car so I could sleep in the car at night. I failed because I allowed myself to return to that pool that took everything from me. I didn't appreciate the hard work I did for three-three months to stabilize myself, which gave me some sort of leverage and a cleaner lifestyle. It occurred to me! I cut my habits for three months and was able to save more money in the bank than I had worked for in the past with all my jobs! Going through the withdrawal stage is not what made me a failure, it was the fact that I accepted this decision that I had made knowing what had been done to me before when I I chose this lifestyle that I was now returning to. I could have gone through my withdrawal phase in New York, seeking the necessary help; and continued to progress with no reason to go home. Now my choice was to return to that dark pit and that is one of the reasons why that decision failed me. The people I surrounded myself with made me lose time... middle of paper... the decisions I made. It took me a while to realize that I could make changes and be successful. I was deeply affected by this negative view of myself. I didn't know that it was failure that caused this deep pain in me that caused so much sorrow in my mind, my heart and my life. It took me a while to rebuild myself one way or another; and at the time, I didn't understand that I could turn my failure into a successful future; and you could do it!. Even more so, I didn't know I could learn from the times I failed. Learn from every decision you make and you will continue to learn and thrive. Be passionate about your desire, but don't let your emotions control your ability to learn from the choices you make. When you keep an open mind to learning, failure becomes a lot like motor oil. It will lubricate your engine so you can run smoothly while fueled by your success..